Aw cmon, maybe take a step back, relax, and don't force yourself to upload.
It's not a job. It's a hobby.
Trust me, growing your channel is a lot of work. I've been doing this since 2014 and haven't even reached anywhere near the level of what people would call a small time vlogger. But I still do it anyway because it's fun, and there is someone out there who looks forward to watching my content whenever I put something out whenever I felt like it.