Odd Tales of the Road......

[ShotokanSmith]

This episode:

"Wasp"

While riding home from work one late afternoon, passing the familiar farm land speckled with cattle. I was stung by two wasp, or was it one was that got me twice? This is the tricky bit. The wasp/s must have been captured buy the sleeve of my shirt, blowing open in the wind. It/they than proceeded to climb downward to my lower back, stinging strategically on either side of the lumbar. from that moment on My lower back began to relax in the seat and the rest of the ride was very pleasant. I've seen on TV that they use honey bees for arthritis pain relief, well wasp must work too, because I felt great the rest of that evening.

True Story.......

 

[AndyB365]

Well, you don't know until someone has tried it In which case, I could do with being stung by a wasp or a bee xD

 

[ShotokanSmith]

Ever looked into your rearview mirror to see a twin headlights behind you on a lonely dark road, than you look again and its gone!!!!

Share your "Odd tales of the road"...


Subscribe and bee free....
http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCn3D1klqe6MZmZCk8taGvSA

 

[janx101]

Ever looked into your rearview mirror to see a twin headlights behind you on a lonely dark road, than you look again and its gone!!!!

no .. but a few people driving in front of me have!!

.. odd tales though....

hmm ... not really 'odd' .. more like 'stupid!' ..

i have been driving trucks for a lot of years ... and back in my younger 'invincible' days i would cheat the government logbook/driving hours and just keep on pushing...

you know the movie BlackDog? ... patrick swayze ... well i havent seen the dog... think thats a yankee thing... but i have been so tired and forcing myself to stay awake .... that the white posts with reflectors beside the road ... started to turn into wallabies and kangaroos (aussie obviously) .. and jump back and forth over the white line ...

then one night i went to sleep at the wheel and ended up in a farm field, still upright ... checked the truck, drove back onto the road, 'fixed' the fence wire, left a sorry note.... drove about 3km up the road to the next safe pull over spot and went properly to sleep in the bunk ..

and now i stick to the driving hours rules .... mostly!

 

[ShotokanSmith]

no .. but a few people driving in front of me have!!

hahaha.....

 

[ShotokanSmith]

Tired driving stirs up lots of nice optical illusions, thank goodness we have those ridges on the side of the road that wake you up if you roll over them....

 

[ShotokanSmith]

Well...I watched some of your vids, the singing one...hahahahaa...loved it....

 

[janx101]

ahh lol .. the singing.... see thats the thing... i have mates and family that tell me my singing is crap! .. i know it .. so its all good... not like those poor bastards that go on Australian/American/whereever Idol, or "somewhere has talent" ... they sing bad ... B A D!!!!! ... but their friends and family havent got the guts to tell them so! ... so they go on the reality tv tryout shows ... and the whole world goes ...

i deliberately vlog the singing ... knowing its bloody awful!! ... and enjoy that everyone that watches has to be going

...

but anyway .. another tale of the road ... just got back from a truck trip ... western victoria, australia .... passing through some little town down the road from 'bumfuq' .... there is this dude walking a funny looking dog on a leash beside the road ... really funny looking dog!!.... look again ... its a miniature horse/donkey ... it looked like an old animal... grey nose, taggy looking coat ... but the whole critter.... was only about up to 'your hip' high at the tips of its ears ...

looks like this one .. just a random pic though... but it was old and scruffy! ... and the dude was just strolling along .. just like you'd walk a dog anyway!

 

[ShotokanSmith]

This Episode

"Hawk"

My wife rides a 2005 Honda shadow Aero 750 but on this occasion we swapped bikes because I had to have the Aero serviced. She took my, then, 2005 honda shadow VLX 600 to work.
One brite weekday morning enroute to a meeting in another town she met with a wing fate. A hawk the size of C-130 Hercules Gunship Swooped down to grab a "Very Large Snack", so it thought. smashing through my favorite burnt orange windshield that matched the burnt orange paint scheme of my ole bike it landed on her lap for a count to 3. It looked at her as if to say "I am so very sorry for this" and flew away, embarrassed and unharmed. What is remarkable about this, is with the chaos of 1/4" thick plastic pieces flying everywhere, wings flapping violently, my wife managed to keep the front tire of that bike riding on a straight line.

Sometimes you have to let the world do what its gonna do. When you're riding, you're riding and all concentration should be on the road ahead.

True Story.......


http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCn3D1klqe6MZmZCk8taGvSA

 

[ShotokanSmith]

This Episode

"Skid saved, Girl gone"

Riding to work again, always riding to work. Seams the only thing exiting happens is when i am riding to work. Anyway it was warm so it had to be summer. The signal lights on the main drag approaching my office occur about every 3rd or 4th street crossing. Well about a block away from one signal light I noticed a girl in very short shorts walking on the sidewalk on the right. I watched not noticing that I am approaching a signal light with a car in front of me. you no what that means, I am going and car in front is stopped. I didn't seemed to care I am invisible, i'll just go through the car. I looked forward and coming up fast was a bumper, a big black bumper, with my name written in blood all over it. I gently, no aggressively, no in a shear panic squeezed the right hand brake and slammed hard on the rear foot brake. I felt the bike start to slide. "What!! My rear wheel actually thinks it is gonna try to pass my front wheel?" At this point I would like you to stop time and view the scene. My bike turned 45 deg. to the left, and listing about the same 45 deg. and look of shear horror, and panic on my face. Mixed in with thoughts of "what did my wife tell me to get at the grocery store on the way home?" and a big black bumper with huge sharp bloody teeth, snarling and growling hungrily for my flesh. We hit the "play" button; I come to my senses and twist hard on the throttle for one-one thousandth of a second. This caused my rear wheel to line up, and this is the important part, behind my front wheel in a straight perfect line. Squeezing the brake again quickly, like a human anti-lock brake mechanism, i come to a stop. two and seventeen-thirty-seconds of and inch away from a disappointed looking bumper. I looked up and here is where this story qualifies as an "Odd tales of the road" story, she was gone....disappeared. no girl anywhere, there is no place for her to hide. no building for her to suddenly enter....Just gone!!! Abducted by aliens?

True story....

 

[MrFalloffalot]

I noticed a girl in very short shorts walking on the sidewalk

and their banning and fining Riders for having Cameras, that 'Distract' drivers.....WTF!!!!
Ban the girls in the Hot cloaths??





WAIT....Dont...Id rather be distracted
> : )

 

[Riding Japan]

This episode:

"Wasp"

While riding home from work one late afternoon, passing the familiar farm land speckled with cattle. I was stung by two wasp, or was it one was that got me twice? This is the tricky bit. The wasp/s must have been captured buy the sleeve of my shirt, blowing open in the wind. It/they than proceeded to climb downward to my lower back, stinging strategically on either side of the lumbar. from that moment on My lower back began to relax in the seat and the rest of the ride was very pleasant. I've seen on TV that they use honey bees for arthritis pain relief, well wasp must work too, because I felt great the rest of that evening.

True Story.......

was probably one wasp
as you may know, wasps don t have a hook on the stinger like bees do, which means they can just pull it out more easily and sting more than once.

had a bee once caught in my sleeve, and fucker stung me on the right arm.

wasn t very pleasant

 

[ShotokanSmith]

was probably one wasp
as you may know, wasps don t have a hook on the stinger like bees do, which means they can just pull it out more easily and sting more than once.

had a bee once caught in my sleeve, and fucker stung me on the right arm.

wasn t very pleasant

But did the Arthur-rightus Stop heartin afterwards tho, thats the question I have....

 

[ShotokanSmith]

This Episode

"Show Off"

All of motorcyclist, Well lets talk straight, us Bikers. Like to take our bikes to the store to buy a small amount of things. We all do it. We come out of the store and carefully/strategically place bags in our saddle bags(if you have them).
We proudly mount our steeds as the girls go walking buy. Giving a slight howdy ma'am smile we throw on our helmets with the grace of ancient Roman soldier donning his battle helmet. Stick the key into the ignition then glance to see if the girls are still watching, yes they are. I can start my powerful 1300cc power plant and rev the engine like a lion roaring as warning to keep out of my territory. You wave to the girls, they giggle, you smile. Squeezing the clutch and stepping into first gear your plan is to pass through the parking lane where the girls are unloading their stuff. Gently twisting the throttle and........Kurplunk!! killed! popped to hard on the clutch! Your one and only bag of cans you forgot to stuff into your saddle bags spill all over ground. You can hear the laughter spreading throughout the parking lot and throughout the city. Drop the darken face mask, pick your stuff, and try again. You sneak away, your only hope....

True Story.....

 

[janx101]

bahahahahaha .. that last one is a cracker!!

 

[ShotokanSmith]

bahahahahaha .. that last one is a cracker!!

The reality behind this story is that it wasn't me it happened too, but my friend on his Vulcan 900. I was with him and we parked our bikes on the end-caps (the yellow stripped area at the end of the parking slots)
he was on the opposite side of a lane from me....I know hard to explain, wish I can draw it. but anyway, i was just as embarrassed as he....hahahaha.

 

[ShotokanSmith]

This Episode

"Where is my Bike"

Short story. Stopped at a Walmart, yes I said Walmart, needed a white shirt for a Company thing. While in the store I decided to check out whats new at the GoPro booth, as I always do. Just to see if GoPro game out with any new fangled gadget accessory. I was in the store for about 15 minutes when I decided to leave. Paid the lady, walked out the sliding door. "Oh No!! Where is my bike? Crap, did someone steel it?" Panic set in as I walked to the end-cap parking space where I usually park. It is legal to park on a striped end-cap if the handicap loading loading zone is on the other side of the handicap parking space. Illegal if the stripped end-cap IS the loading zone. I already got a ticket thrown out because citizen-police took a picture of my bike, where they thought was an illegal spot.
Anyway, back to the story, which was supposed to be short. Thoughts ran through my head of how I would never see my beloved VTX again. Until....I realized I drove the Van.

True Story......Some embellishments.

 

[Riding Japan]

that was ur subconsciousness rebelling about the face that you took the lame ass van

 

[ShotokanSmith]

that was ur subconsciousness rebelling about the face that you took the lame ass van

That has to be it....hhahaha

 

[ShotokanSmith]

This Episode

Who's Following Me!!!

It was a late summers night in August of 2009 my wife had given me the call from her office. She told me she had to work overtime, and I had to cook dinner for myself. I didn't mind I do pretty good on my own, TV dinners with a splash of extra seasonings will do perfect.
Around 11:30 pm that night is when my wife finally left the office. She, unlike some women motorcyclist I know, do not have a problem with night riding. Her fuel gauge screamed at her for a gas stop so 5 miles down the road she stopped for a fill and maybe a soda too. She has a cup holder on her bike so why not? Filled up her tank and pulled away directly onto the highway heading west. It was dark and not a soul can be seen on the road in either direction. except for flashing headlights about a mile back and catching up quickly. "Who is this idiot?" she said to her self, as she twists a little harder on the throttle. Closer and closer the vehicle came as if she didn't exist in front of him, until he was right at her back wheel. "My goodness!" proclaimed my wife who is not known for such language. She sped up but to no avail the car kept right up with her, now blowing his horn and frantically flashing his lights. "What does he want with me?!" By this time she was frightened. They where speeding down the highway 90mph, 100mph, 110mph, with lights flashing and horns blowing. Relief appeared up ahead in the form of another gas station. Lit up and teaming with vehicle activity, people. she pulled in thinking the crazy man behind her would keep going straight ahead and forget about her. But he followed her to the station. She stops the bike, kills the engine, kicks down the kick stand and begins to run for the indoor part of the gas station when the man rang out. "Wait!! Don't go!! i have to tell you something!" She stopped and turned to look at him. "What in the blazzes do you want with me!" she screamed using even more foul language. His face now closely in front of her "At the other gas station! When you went inside, a man with a knife got on your rear seat and rode with you. I tried to warn you many times!" She turned to look in horror at a middle-aged man wearing a black tweed jacket sipping a class of champagne and in his other hand a large knife........

True Story?